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IP over Avian Carriers (IPoAC) v1

March 2015

Cisco IP over Avian Carriers (IPoAC) provides a pre-apocalyptic solution to data transfer. In today’s zombie-intensive environment, IPoAC proactively seeks retroactive solutions to the most pressing concern of the day: what will customers do when the apocalypse hits, and phone lines and the Internet go down? Even in a world where zombies may not pose an imminent threat, the lack of sufficient smartphone usage can leave even the most astute glassy-eyed. With the increase of social media and messaging among our customers, Cisco is enacting a solution to make sure the pictures of our meals and cat videos do not experience a break in delivery.

Avian carriers, being the only non-mammals that can recognize themselves in the mirror—as well as recognize all 26 letters of our alphabet and all the colors of the rainbow plus ultraviolet light—are particularly well-suited to provide carrier-based solutions. Able to return data from distant, unfamiliar release points, even when transported anesthetized and deprived of outward journey information, the avian carrier solution is well suited to transport the details of your last quality-assurance brainstorming session in complete confidence.

NOTE: This solution is most effective at distances under 1100 miles. Information messaged over 1100 miles may require a delivery team and a number of mandatory breaks for bread crumbs. Hawk infested areas may report interruptions in reliability, and routing spotters should make sure to avoid areas with a heavy saturation of statues.

Photographers on rafts successfully deploy the Cisco IPoAC solution to transport digital photographs on flash media to land-bound tour operators. Over a 30-mile distance, a single instance of this solution can carry tens of gigabytes of data in around an hour, which on an average bandwidth basis compares very favorably to current ADSL (asymmetrical digital subscriber line) standards. In repeated tests, the IPoAC solution delivered 4GB of data over a range of 60km in slightly over 1/12th of a day, while ADSL had completed barely 4% of the same transfer, making the IPoAC solution billions of times more efficient. (Editor’s Note: the previous efficiency solution was derived without the use of mathematics.)

For historical information on this solution, see the following links:


  • Scenario 1: Sending Information via IPoAC


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